I'm not the only one
by Lia H. James
Summary: Felix and Brigette are in love, but he's been seeing someone for 2/3 of their marriage. What will Bridgette do about it?
1. Chapter One

I dispose of the condom in the bin provided and I dress myself up. I look at Lilian laying naked in the hotel bed and I have to contain the urge of seeking round number 3 in her arms.

"Are you sure you can't stay for a little longer?" her sweet voice asks sending shivers down my spine. The power that woman has on me that I cannot comprehend.

"I'm afraid I have to, Lilian. I have to go back home"

This has been going on for a while. This...relationship. I must admit it is not something that I am proud of, but I can't resist the need to be with Lilian. She satisfies me in ways Bridgette can't.

Don't get me wrong, my sweet wife is what you can describe as perfection. She is talented, beautiful, kind, generous, nice and sweet and everything a man could ever ask for. But she lacks that thing that I seek. Passion I may call it. She is not bad in bed, but I don't feel full if you get what I mean.

Of course I've felt guilty of this secret relationship that I keep from her. And at the start it was supposed to be a one night stand, but after realizing that Lilian and I shared a wonderful connection and that we could work on each other's needs we decided to start a relationship. This has been going on for almost two years, and I can safely say that Bridgette knows nothing about it. And I won't tell her.

"But why not, my love?" I can hear her ask.

Even though I do enjoy having sex with her, I have to say that I do not love her. Our relationship is just physical and that is it. On the contrary I love Bridgette with all my heart, she's my light and my happiness. She's everything to me. I am in love with her.

"I told you not to call me that, Lilian. Remember?"

"Yes, sorry. You still haven't answered my question though"

I sigh. We've had this conversation before.

"I have to go back to my wife and you know that. We cannot make her suspect a thing"

"Yes, I know, I know, but don't you ever get tired of hiding? Don't you want to just tell her the truth?"

"That, I cannot do I'm afraid. It will break her into pieces. I can't do that to her"

"But technically you've already have. She just doesn't know"

I remain silent. She does have a point. But I won't admit it. I must delay the inevitable.

"Just think about it" she says finally to fall back into the covers and face the opposite way of where I am standing.

I grab my last things and I make myself presentable while I leave the room and start heading to my penthouse, where Bridgette might be waiting for me with dinner ready. I cannot wait to get home and see her.

It doesn't take me long to get home and to open the door of our lovely place. The whole penthouse smells like fresh pasta and pesto, and I cannot wait to eat it.

"Hey, cookie. I'm home"

I can hear music coming from the kitchen. She must be there.

"Dinner's ready!" I can hear her say from inside the kitchen while I hang my coat on one of the hangers "make yourself comfortable while I fetch you a plate"

"Okay, princess" I say while I take a seat on the table.

It doesn't take her long to exit the kitchen with two full plates with what seems to be ravioli.

"I made your favorite" Bridgette says while placing one of the plates in front of me.

"That's why you're the best" I murmur while kissing her cheek. Making her giggle like a teenage girl.

"I really hope you like it. It's a new recipe" her adorable voice informs me while sitting in front of me to eat.

"I cannot wait to try it. How's your day been?" I take a bite after asking the question.

"Nothing much today. But I did find something interesting"

"Really? Do tell" I say while chewing "wow. This tastes amazing, love"

"Well I'm glad, I wanted you to really enjoy your last meal cooked by me"

I stop chewing.

What did she say?

"I beg your pardon?" confusion entagles with my words. I must've heard her wrong.

"Don't act like you didn't hear what I just said, Felix. This is my last meal for you from now on you'll be on your own"

"Are you going away somewhere?"

She gives me a simple nod.

"As far away from you as possible" she declares with a smile.

"I... I don't understand"

She gives me a pity smile.

"Believe me, I thought the same when I first found out. But don't worry, you will. Allow me to enlighten you" she pulls out a stack of papers "you will sign these and we will never cross paths again. End of discussion. You won't get to see me, or my cooking or my designs ever again"

I can't understand the words she's saying. Why is she leaving?

"I know about Lilian" she says, like she's read my mind "I've always had. Do you really think I'm that stupid to not notice for 2 years?"

I don't know what to say. Words have suddenly left my brain.

"I..."

"No. Please, let me talk" she begs "I've been waiting for you to leave her for so long. So damn long. And you still haven't. So that's it, that's it for us. This will be goodbye"

"Listen, Brigette. I was going to tell you, I promise. I don't love her, I swear. I just use her for sex... " I say trying to fix things. But it's too late. I know it is when I look at her face.

I shouldn't have said that.

She looks at me hurt. I expect her to yell at me, to slap me, to punch me, to scream. But she's silent. She's disappointed, I can feel it. But not at me, at herself. And there is where I know that I won't be able to win her back even if I tried.

"I wasn't good enough?" her voice sounds so fragile it breaks my soul.

No.

Oh my God. No.

Silent tears role down her cheeks.

"I... Didn't expect that. I thought that you were in love with her and you didn't want to tell me. Or I even expected to hear that she was manipulating you or something. But this... Not this... I..."

I try to reach her hand over the table. She doesn't pull away, she's too busy silently crying to pull away. I need to do something.

"Cookie, listen to me: you are more than enough. You're perfect, goddammit!"

"You fucking liar" hearing her curse makes me jump slightly from my seat "if I was as perfect as you said you wouldn't have run into another woman's arms!"

"But that is my fault. I am the one who was an idiot..."

"For 2 years"

I take a deep breath.

"Yes, 2 years"

"We've been married almost 3 years, Felix"

"I know..."

"Why so long? Why didn't you just tell me?"

"Because I knew you would react this way"

She stands up so fast she makes one of the plates fall. She couldn't care less though.

"Then fucking tell me how to react you fucking bastard. Heh? How am I supposed to react to the fact that the love of my life says than I'm fucking perfect but yet he goes and fucks another woman!"

"Bridgette, please sit. Let's talk about this like the civilized adults that we are"

"No, you're not an adult. You're a stupid fucking teenager who only thinks with his dick. You couldn't care less about my feelings!"

"How can you say that? You're the most important thing to me! Why do you else think I didn't tell you sooner about this? I didn't want to hurt you!"

"Well that went really fucking well, didn't it?" she says letting out a somber chuckle.

I can hear her breathing, she has a thin layer of sweat on her forehead. Her eyes are burning with rage.

"Please, cookie... I'm sorry"

"No you aren't" she mumbles "you never are, because if you were you would've stopped as soon as it started. Ever since I found out about you two, I've tried to be ten times better. Better for you, for the company, for me and I failed... You still went to her every fucking night. And you know what the worst part is? I blame myself, for not treating you well. I did everything in my power to make you the happiest man alive, and I failed..." there's pain in her words. There's anger. There's guilt.

"Princess, that's not true. You've made me the happiest..."

"But it wasn't enough... I'm not enough"

She turns around and takes her purse. She starts heading towards the main door.

"Don't wait for me. Feel free to sign those papers, I give up"

And with that she leaves.

And I'm left alone. With two plates with delicious food that has turned cold.

And I can only think of one thing:

I've lost her.


	2. Chapter Two

It's been hours since Bridgette left the house, I cleaned the kitchen and prepared the house as neat as possible, even though there wasn't much to be done. I cooked soup when I saw that it started raining outside and I would've left to look for her. But I knew that if I left the penthouse and she came while I was gone, I would never see her again. All her stuff is here, she'll come back eventually.

Or at least I hope she does.

After what feels like forever, I can hear the keys jingling on the door. I quickly stand up to meet my wife. But what I endup seeing is a really drunk version of her.

I rush myself to her side to help her come in, she can barely walk. I'm surprised she even managed to open the door.

"No... I can... I can...you... Leave"

"It's okay cookie, I got you, don't worry"

"don't... Not cook... Cookie"

I start guiding her to the bedroom, she can barely talk.

"Yes, cookie. I'll take you to bed, you need some rest. We'll talk in the morning"

"No... No talk, you leave"

"Bridgette, even if I wanted to, I can't leave you like this"

"Why not?...you...did...did that... Every ni... ght"

I don't respond. I just open the bedroom door and guide her to the bed.

She starts to giggle for no reason.

"what's so funny?" I ask while I start taking her heels off her.

"No... Nothing"

"Come on, tell me. What made my princess laugh?"

"I... You... Baby"

I stop what I'm doing, I'm making eye contact with her.

"Say that again?"

"I... Baby, I had...and you... Now... No"

"Jesus Christ, how much have you had, I can barely understand what you're saying"

"Taco... Tuesday"

"Cookie it's Thursday, and what does that have to do with... ?"

Then I remember, the day she was sick, we went out for tacos. She had been nauseous for a while now and she looked really pale, Bridgette loves tacos so I took her and we had a great time. She was about to tell me something at several times of the day, but she never did.

Was she talking about that?

"Princess... Are you...?"

Her head moves from side to side. A silent "no" scapes her lips. She looks down to her hands and starts to sob.

"I... I lost.. Baby"

"Oh... Cookie. Why didn't you tell me?" I say trying to hug her.

"You were... Gone... Her"

I pause for a second, trying to set my guilt aside.

"... I'm sorry, Bridgette. I truly am"

She moves her head in disagreement. Her cheeks are red and her eyes watery.

"Please go..." she begs me.

"Why would you tell me about something so important like that now?"

"Go away... Couch"

"But I wanna help you get into bed"

"you have... Enough... Done... enough"

I'm obviously hurt that she won't let me be there for her, specially after she said something so important like that. But I get why she's telling me to leave.

"Alright, I'll see you in the morning. Okay? "

I grab my pijama set and a pillow before heading out of the room and leaving her alone on the bed.

When I look at the designer sofa I mentally curse, this is going to be a long and uncomfortable night.

—————————————————————

If it wasn't because I created a new sleeping position, my back would've been destroyed by now. Even though I tried, I couldn't get any sleep. I've been thinking about how to fix the mess I'm in.

I have to be honest with myself, I know that she has all the right to leave right now or whenever she likes. I know that even if I can fix this, I can never go back to fix my mistakes. I know that I'm screwed, but at least I'm going to try.

"Good morning, cookie" I say as I enter the room holding a breakfast tray.

"Hi..." her hair is messy, she's wearing last night's clothes and her lipstick is all smudged over the white pillow.

"Can we talk?... It's okay if you don't, I'd understand completely" I leave the tray on the bed while I watch her sit while scratching her head.

"We can talk, go ahead"

"Really? That easy? I made a whole speech about why you should hear me out" I try to lighten up the mood.

"Just talk, Felix. I have a terrible headache and I'm being nice to you because even though you're an asshole I love you, so just spit out what you have to say and let me eat alone in peace"

"Well, okay, I hope I don't take long. In essence, I screwed up"

"Big time"

"Yes, and, after a lot of thinking, I've come to the conclusion that I can win you back, or earn your trust once again. But it's up to you, what do you want me to do? Do you want me to leave? Do you want to leave?"

"Well, yes. I want a divorce"

"Even...even after you said you still love me?"

"Yes. I can hate you and love you at the same time, I've done so since you started cheating on me"

"I see..." I take a deep breath "then... I guess we can get divorced if that's what you want"

"Wow, you don't fight for my love, kitty?"

"I honestly don't know what to do. I mean, I love you. I've always loved you. But I just don't know how to fix this"

"Well, start by answering some questions please"

"Yes, of course. What's on your mind?"

She starts cutting her pancakes without making eye contact with me, I've seen this kind of behavior on her before. She's trying not to cry...

"Why her?"

Such a small yet sad question.

"I... I don't know. We just had chemistry. And it was that feeling of... Of new, of passion. I won't miss it though. I shouldn't have started it in the first place" I reply honestly.

She starts chewing, more times than what she uses to. She swallows, takes a deep shaky breath and talks again.

"I'm not enough then? You could've asked me for more passion. We could've rolled play so it was 'new'. I could've been better... If you asked"

I don't respond. I don't know what to say, she just keeps eating, not looking at me, not looking up.

"I don't have any right to ask you to do that, I'm the stupid one. I should change and stop being such an asshole. I promised myself to never hurt you after I found out I broke your heart so many times back when we were teenagers. I owe you all my personal growth, you've made me the happiest man for so many years and all I've brought you has been sadness and tears. I don't know how to fix this, I'm sorry"

She nods while still chewing. She has started to cry silently.

"I've always been the one chasing you... I think it's time for you to chase me and try to win my love"

"I will. So how are we going to do this? "

"I've been thinking too. I came to the conclusion last night that, this is your last chance. And I mean it, you know I mean it" I nod "I'm going to give you one year. I won't sign the papers, but I want you to sign them. If you mess up, if you go back to her or anyone for that matter, I'll sign them and I promise you'll never see me again. Understood?"

"Yes"

"I want you to be better. I'm tired of being the one that is trying to reach perfection when you don't give a damn and still go back to her. I want you to go through what I went through for 2 years. We'll still be married but I'll be entitled to flirt with men, to sleep with them if I want to, heck, I can even leave you for them if I want. And you can't say shit, okay? I want you to see how hurtful it is to see the love of your life so close yet so far. How can the love of your life life slip through your fingers so easily and you can't do anything to stop them for leaving"

I'm speechless, I wanna let her talk.

"Win me back, Kitty. Don't make me regret loving you"

"One year"

"Only one"

"More than enough. I'll fix this, thank you"

"Don't make me regret this"


	3. Chapter Three (1st Month)

She's been working late these last few days, she's been so busy with the new fashion collection coming up. Bridgette has said that she's had a lot of inspiration and that it's the reason why she's been so busy.

There hasn't been a day where I didn't bring her her favorite coffee at her office or a day where I didn't wait for her so we could go home together. (I haven't done that in 2 years since I would "stay late" at work when in reality I was with Lilian, it feels good to go home with her.)

She hasn't been rude to me, quite the contrary, she's been sort of the same. Of course, there's always those comments or things she does that show she's still resentful. Like serving my coffee in the mornings cold, or not ironing my shirts as she used to every Sunday. She doesn't ask what I want to watch on the TV anymore, she just puts whatever she wants, and never asks me what I want for dinner, she just makes what she feels like.

She also doesn't say goodnight anymore, she just says "I'm going to sleep" and doesn't respond when I wish her goodnight. That does sort of bothers me because she's never done that, not even when we got into serious fights on our 1st year as a married couple.

Regardless of all that, I'm still here, because I have one year. Just one year to win her back.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel lucky, I am so lucky she hasn't kicked my ass out yet. But I do live in constant fear of waking up and finding out she's gone from my life. Not that I wouldn't deserve it...

I broke things with Lilian, deleted our texts and her number. And I found myself for some weird reason extremely attracted to my wife. I get that it sounds pretty weird as I should be attracted to her, and I am. It's just, it seems like she has that thing I went with Lilian for, that passion. It's just, I think I just didn't notice it on her before. This makes me mad at myself because this huge mistake wouldn't have happened if I just saw it! If only you could see her when she's working on a new design, or the way she bosses people around, I love how focused she is and how powerful she looks. It makes me want to kiss her and make love to her right on her desk. It's a pity that her walks are transparent though...

Regardless of that, I can say that I am happy. I am secretly thankful to her because she hasn't talked to other guys or slept with anyone. Believe me, if that ever happens, my heart will break. Not that I don't deserve it, I completely do. I just don't want to know that I'm no longer the only man that has been with her. It won't make me love her any less, it's just, I don't know. No matter what happens or what I do, I know that I'll always be her first and only. And now that there's a chance that it might not be, it makes me want to vomit if I'm being honest. It's childish, I know, but I can't help it.

I haven't noticed the time until now, I better finish this paperwork so I can head into her office and take her home. Maybe I could cook some tacos tonight. She loves the ones I make because I learned from a Mexican chef. Anyways, that's irrelevant. I stop putting the documents away when I hear a knock on the door.

"Hey, got a second?" My secretary asks, popping her head through the door.

"Not really, I'm kinda rushing, but what's up?"

"This will only take a minute, I promise." She gives me a soft smile, and I feel guilty in denying her request.

"Alright, what do you have for me?" She comes in, wearing a half-opened coat and I can see her red sensual lingerie. "God! What are you doing?" I look away, gesturing for her to stop.

"Well, truth is, I heard you guys were getting a divorce and..."

"Wait! What? Who said that? Not to mention, this is completely inappropriate, please cover yourself up!"

"It's...not true?" She asks, slowly closing her coat, unsure.

"Of course it isn't! Jesus, we are going through a rough patch but we are not getting divorced. Not if I can help it." I add, packing up my things quicker. I need to get out of here as soon as possible.

"But everyone is saying that you guys are basically separated"

"Well, you can tell them to fuck off, alright?"

"But-But people have seen her on dates with other men..."

I pause, uncertain. My heart breaks and I momentarily wonder if that's how Bridgette felt when she found out.

"They have?"

"Yes...remember Clark? He was seen asking her out as she was talking to her secretary, she's the one that told me."

"I see..." I take a deep shaky breath, there is no need to panic, not yet. Maybe she is just making it out now to get me to sleep with her. "Well, thanks for telling me. And I am flattered, but please, don't ever do that to me again."

"Understood. I'm sorry, I didn't know."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, just...please get out of here."

"Yes, sir...but are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm damned sure! Jesus..."

"Alright, sorry, I'll leave."

She does as she promises, and I am left alone in my office. The frame on my desk, a picture of Bridgette and I on our first anniversary when we were young.

I've made lots of mistakes, I'll never deny that. But the biggest one was not wanting her in my life. Younger me had no idea how much she would mean to me. Look at me, I am sad, no, devastated that what my secretary said might be true. What if she's seeing other men? If she is, it's just a matter of time until she leaves, I signed the papers, she's free.

But I don't want her to be free. Not yet, I still have 11 months to go.

I grab my keys and my suitcase, I leave with haste. She's not going to leave, not on my watch.

I run to the elevator, and the journey to the floor below is eternal. Her office is there, there's still time. I have to pick her up, either way, maybe she's still...

The elevator doors open, and I see the office.

She's laughing.

And he's standing close, smiling.

No. NO!

The elevator doors are closing again before I even get a chance to leave but I stop them with my hand.

No! I still have 11 more months!

I walk, I try to walk at a normal pace so I appear composed. They haven't noticed me yet, but they can if they look through the glass.

"Honey?" I call, as I open the door, not bothering to knock.

"Just one second, Clark was just telling me the funniest story."

"Yes, if you could wait outside?" The bastard asks.

"Excuse me? That's my wife."

"Well, you didn't seem to care when-"

"Did she tell you? And what did you do? Did you sleep with her to make her feel better? What a great sacrifice." I mock, quickly losing my calm.

"FELIX!" She yells, both Clark and I jump slightly. "Wait outside!"

"But-"

"Did I stutter?"

"Sorry" Clark mockingly apologizes.

"You know what? I'll see you at home"

"But-But I thought we were going to go home together-"

"Not anymore."

"I-"

"Mr. Agreste...she told you to leave" I ignore him, staring at my wife. She looks so angry. I wonder if she is saying that I lost my chance.

"You signed the papers..." I whisper halfheartedly, the realization hits me. She looks down and gulps.

"Felix, I haven't and you know that. But I am VERY close in signing them if you do not leave my office right now!" With my heart a little at ease, I finally do as I'm told and wait outside. Yeah, I was not going home after this fight. I am well aware that she can see me through the glass, but I'll wait for her.

I'm no longer running away from my mistakes.

I can hear her apologize to him and laugh some more. I wait for a total of 30 minutes before he comes outside.

"You should let her go," Clark says, putting on his coat.

"I don't have to listen to you." I seethe.

"You can come in now, Felix" Bridgette's voice can be heard from inside the office.

"Good luck dude, you'll need it."

"Don't talk to me as if we were pals." I say as I walk towards the door "And if I ever see you flirt again with my wife, I'll beat you. Understood?" I don't bother to give him one last look, I just open the door and leave him behind.

"Felix..." Bridgette calls in a warning tone.

"I know, I know what you're going to say. Alright? And let me get ahead of you, I'm sorry. Okay? I'm an idiot, I know that."

"You are...but I get it."

"You do?"

"I do." She sighs. "It's kinda nice to know that you're protective of me. Even if you didn't do it in the classiest way" She admits.

"Of course I am, why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know, I really didn't think you cared about me since I found out about her. I thought that maybe you just stayed with me out of an obligation more than love."

"How could you think that? I thought I showed you how much I loved you every day."

"Yeah, well, it's pretty hard to believe all the 'I love you's when you leave your wife to see your side woman."

"Yeah well..."

"Let's go home, alright?"

"That's it? You're not going to yell at me or tell me to fuck off?"

"Nope" She stands up, grabbing her purse "but I will make you pay for that kind of embarrassment."

"What will you do?" She starts walking towards the door, I move aside so she can leave first.

"I'll go out with him, and...ah, what the hell. I'll even fuck him. And you know what? You can't say anything against it."

My heart breaks for the second time today as she opens the door. She only gives me a side glance before leaving the room.

This is going to hurt more than I thought.

* * *

Hello everyone! I'm so sorry it's taken me forever to update. I don't know how much longer this story will be but I love the reviews! Thank you for the feedback and love :)

I went through a rough patch and quite frankly didn't want to keep writing, besides, I was more focused on the books I'm writing for publishing. But I reread it and thought it deserves closure. So thank you all and I hope to update soon :)

I also have a Wattpad account :) @Lia_H_James

and Instagram if anyone is interested lol @lia_h_james

Hope you guys enjoyed it! Let me know what you think.


	4. Chapter Four (2nd Month)

I'm sitting in the living room. A bottle of scotch half full in front of me as I hold the glass in my hand.

"Oh, Clark" I hear her moan from our bedroom "Don't stop!"

I keep silently crying as I gulp down my drink. Do I really need to be here for this? It's not like I'm watching them, but at least I had the decency to not do it in our own home.

"Oh, yes, YES" Bridgette cries, I can hear his grunts too.

God, I don't want to but I really do deserve this pain in my chest.

With a shaky hand, I try to call Adrien as I know I need to keep myself distracted. I know I deserve to listen and to cry until I die but God, I really can't. I can't. Not her...

"Hello?" My cousin's voice can be heard on the phone.

"Hey, buddy" I greet in a quiet tone, I shut my eyes trying to make the noise stop. I really want to leave. But every time I ignore it, I just grow more aware of it.

"What's up, Felix? What's the matter? Are you alright?" That's my little cousin...always so worried for others.

"No...not really?" I admit, letting out a somber chuckle.

"Tell me, what's going on?"

"I- erm, Brid is fucking another guy right now." I sigh, heavily. "Like, literally in our bedroom."

"What?! How- Why would you even tell me that? God, the image. I can't-"

"Adrien, I need to talk, please, I can't leave and I feel this heavyweight in my chest that's becoming heavier and heavier by the minute. And I know I deserve it but it's too much, Adrien, it's way too much. God, did I do this to her?" I say, starting to ramble.

"Alright, well, how did this happen?"

"Remember Lilian?"

"That girl who is always throwing yourself at you that you've been cheating Bridgette with for the past 2 years?" He asks, in a neutral tone.

"How did you know?"

"I'd love to say that I'm an observant guy, but truth is, I saw the text messages on your phone a little after you and Bridgette's first anniversary as a married couple."

"Jesus...wait, does that mean Marinette knows as well?"

"No, I didn't tell her. She would've killed you in that instant and I don't think Bridgette would've like that" He pauses "But I did tell Bridgette about it. She's like a sister to me and- and I couldn't bear for you to break her heart once again."

"How-how did she react?"

"Do you want me to tell you the truth or a version of the truth that will let you sleep at night?"

"God! Bridgette! That's it, God, I'm so close. You're so fucking tight, baby" Clark cries from the bedroom which makes me shiver.

"Felix?" Adrien calls, bringing me back to the conversation.

"The truth, please," I beg.

"She...well...she was shocked. Like, she couldn't move at all and I could see the light leave her eyes. Do you know that mischievous spark that she always has? Yeah, well, it was fading. But like, she suddenly came back, you know? It was the oddest thing, she blinked twice and smiled at me as if nothing was happening. She said: Thank you for telling me, please don't tell Mari, I'll handle it."

"No..."

"I'm not done, you wanted to hear the full thing, now listen." He takes a deep breath and continues, "I asked her if she was sure, and I offered to confront you, her smile grew wider and her eyes became watery, she said: I've had my suspicions for a couple of weeks, I just need for him to notice me again." His voice becomes shaky. "she said: I'm sure it is all a misunderstanding."

"Adrien..."

"She was broken, Felix! But she came back to the party as if nothing had happened. She laughed at your jokes, she smiled at you and never left your side for the rest of the night. She has been a model wife and you thank her by fucking the first girl that throws herself at you?"

"I'm sorry."

"You better be sorry, because you know what?" I've never heard him so mad before. "Because you deserve to be listening to that. Imagine what it was like for her, every single fucking night! You deserve to cry over her, you deserve to think that you lost her. And I say think because I know that realistically, she will never leave you. She loves you too much for that."

"I know I screwed up, Adrien" I start talking, once I know that he's done yelling at me. "I really do, and I came to an agreement with her. I have a year to win her back."

"Oh yeah? Well, how's that going for ya?"

"Well, she's fucking her employee right now so, not very well."

"Listen..." He sighs "I'm sorry, okay? I shouldn't have lost my cool, but I've waited 2 years to tell you these things...you know?"

"It's okay I-" I get cut off mid-sentence by the sudden appearance of Clark into the room. "Eh, sorry, can I help you?"

"Yeah, I was wondering if I could get a glass of water, a man's gotta recharge, am I right?"

"Get it yourself."

"No, I'd love for you to get it for me." I stand up.

"Listen, Adrien, I'll be back in a second, I need to give this idiot a glass of water."

"Oh...okay?" I hear him say as I lower the phone. I walk over to the kitchen cabinets and I take the glass, fill it with water and hand it over to the shirtless bastard that's staring at me with a smug smile.

"Thanks, I appreciate it."

"Whatever," I mumble.

"I told you, dude, you should let her go."

"Well, I won't, dude."

"Hey, I was just trying to piss you off right about now, but I mean it. Your marriage is too damaged, just let her go and if she truly loves you she can come back or something. It seems like both of you need a break."

"Thanks, but I don't tend to listen to men that fuck married women for marriage advice, you know?"

"Your loss, dude. She deserves to have some fun, and you've fucked up too much to live your life as if nothing has happened." He takes a long sip, emptying the cup. "Thanks" he winks at me and I scoff.

I see him walk away back to the bedroom, my bedroom. And what's worse, Bridgette's giggles and laughter can be heard from inside the room.

God, if I really want her back, I need to step up my game. I walk quickly over to where I left the phone.

"Hey, are you okay?"

"No, not at all. I need to win her back. I am not going to live like this. I know it's selfish, but she's the love of my life."

"Felix..."

"I know, I know it's stupid for me to win her back when I've clearly lost her, alright? But I don't know what else to do! I love her! I love her so much and I know I don't deserve her, I know I do. But I am nothing without her, I am who I am because of her..."

"Okay, then stop moaning about it and grow a pair of balls."

"You're right. Thanks, Adrien."

"No problem, what are you going to-" I end the call and walk over to the bedroom. I don't bother in knocking as I come in, really mad.

"Listen, I understand if you want to leave but you said I have one year and I want to win you back so Clark, leave my house right now! Brid, I'm taking you to the park, we're going to go to your favorite spot and-" I can't continue my pathetic rant as I look at them. They're fully clothed. Bridgette's hairdo remains intact and her makeup is flawless. She does not look like a woman that has been passionately fucked for the last two hours. "I- eh- what?"

"I was low-key wondering how long it would take you to just interrupt us" Clark admits, laughing.

"Yeah, maybe we're just really good actors," Bridgette says, she's laying down on our bed which, by the way, is still made!

"I don't understand," I admit.

"Truth is, I did want to cheat on you, but more than actually cheating on you, I wanted for you to feel what I felt."

"Powerless," I comment, understanding.

"Exactly, kitty." she smiles at me, finally standing up. "Thanks, Clark, for your help."

"My pleasure, baby. Anytime you need to fake sex or...have real sex. I'm here for you." She laughs and kisses his cheek.

"I'll keep it in mind, thank you." I'm still in shock as I see him leave the room and possibly the apartment. "I'm sorry I hurt you, alright?" She brushed a strand of hair behind her ear, not looking at me. "I know I went too far but I didn't want to sleep with anyone else and-"

I can't listen more of her unnecessary apology so I kiss her hard to keep her from talking.

"You're not mad?" She asks me, brushing our noses together.

"Marry me, Bridgette." She giggles.

"We're already married silly"

"No, I mean it. Sign the papers right now and let me make things right."

"What do you mean?"

"Bridgette, I love you so much it hurts, I've loved you for more than a decade. But I didn't honor my vows or my promises. Let me make it up to you."

"Felix..."

"Marry me, Bridgette," I demand, in a quiet, pleading voice. "Please, let me truly call you mine." She moves her head side to side, indicating her negative response.

"I will sign the papers, but I won't marry you, Felix."

"But-"

"I can't. I- quite frankly, I don't want to."

"But I thought-"

"I know how it's going to play out, alright? You're going to love me good for like, what? A year, maybe two after we get remarried. And then you'll leave me for another woman, again."

"No, that won't happen, I swear. I love you too much to make you go through that again. Believe me, after tonight, I know what it felt like for you. God, I wanted to kill him and then myself! I swear I won't-"

"But you will, I know you will. Because it is in your nature to not love me completely."

"What do you mean?" She walks over to the bed and sits down, letting out a sigh.

"You loved Ladybug, and you only loved me when you found out I was her."

"Brid, we've been through this, that is not true, I already held feelings for you but I was too blind to see them. I was stubborn!"

"I don't believe you, though! It took you forever to figure out Ladybug and I were the same person. Do you know how long it took me? Only a couple of seconds."

"Bullshit."

"It's true. We were sort of talking about our civilian lives and you said my name by mistake. I remember it vividly, you said: I had a busy morning, to be honest, and this girl didn't make things easier. She has her moments, but I do hate her. From the moment you said that phrase, I knew it was you. Because it hurt so much to hear you say you hated me. It was the first time you really broke me. I knew at that moment you would never love me so imagine my surprise when you years later asked me to marry you!"

"I-I'm sorry I said that alright? But I was talking to my crush and-"

"Exactly! Ladybug is the woman you thought you'd marry, but you didn't. That's why the passion was not there, at least for you because I still want you as much as our wedding night."

"Bridgette..."

"No, I'm sick of this. Please go sleep on the couch, we'll talk about the divorce tomorrow and-"

"No." I declare.

"Listen, Felix, I am signing those papers and-"

"I said no, Bridgette!" I've started to cry and quite frankly, I feel like a child having a tantrum but I know that the moment one of us leaves the bedroom and if I give in to her wishes, I'll lose her forever. "I won't lose you!"

"Stop being so selfish!"

"But I love you!"

"I know you do and I'll always love you but you fucked up!" I fall onto my knees. Powerless, she wanted me to feel like this, well, she was successful.

"You said I had a year..."

"Yeah, well, I changed my mind-" she looks at me, and I don't know how I must look like for her to kneel down in front of me and hug me. "I'm sorry, okay? But you broke us, and I can't live this lie anymore. I can't pretend everything is alright."

"You said you'd never leave me" I cry, hugging her back, desperate.

"I know I did, I know."

"Please stay, I love you."

"I'm sorry" She stands up, I cry harder. She leaves the room.

I fall asleep on the floor, and I know I will never get her this close to me again.

I'm suddenly standing, I blink in order to focus my vision, condom still in hand, I'm about to throw it into the hotel bin. Where am I? I look to the side and Lilian is in the bed, naked.

"Are you sure you can't stay for a little longer?" She asks, her once sweet voice now feeling poisonous to my ears.

What the fuck is going on?

* * *

Hey! Yeah, I know, super quick lol but I had inspiration and I thought, why not?

So, I have some ideas on how the next chapters will work but I'll see! Thank you again for your support and don't forget to review! 

I love you all, 

Lia


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